now that that thing is over (tthat shocking attempt of a break we had), it's all back to the worrying and dreadful thought of getting back into it all. the holidays served nothing more than 3 at the most days of freedom, where we ate, pooled and dotaaaadded. i suprised my sister when she found out that even on the holidays i still had work 4 days a week but knowing me, i bet she thought it a gift (i would of probably sat on my arse doing nothing anyway).
these days without uni did serve some purpose, a purpose i only attempted to achieve yeseterday night at about 12 where i gathered all my notes and assignments and crammmmed. the end result led to falling asleep in front of the telly watching family guy. i'm gonna definately stop it ay. not just the fact that cramming when you've got absolutely all the time in the world to work on it but leaving the telly on.
earth hour 2008 which started at 8 o'clock saturday night made me way more appreciative on what we've got for granted. wandering the halls of my house holding a wax dripping candle showed just how.....
i'm always there for you, no matter what; sometimes you've got to do what's right, not what's best for you. stay true.
i'm sad today and im not quite sure why. i'm in one of these moods where the world seems to spin right around my stationary self. it feels as though so much is happening around me that it's gonna take me ages to catch up to it. holidays have pretty much pasted now although they're soo short it doesn't really seem like we're in any kind of break anyway. thursdays today, which leaves me absolutely no other day to do anything i had planned at the start of the break, then again, i've been working pretty hard these past couple of day s.
restaurant has been fairly busy, and i guess i've done my satisfactory hours in fishing. i'm still to put a line in the water tho as fishing these holidays have consisted only by cast net. the place myself and paullie found has been nicknamed the mullet hole as that's pretty much alll you catch there. it's a very peacefull place, taking phuccie up there one arvo, we all sat on the abandoned jetty, the one where you reach after climbing around a fence and walking down an unstable as ramp.
sitting there, soaking wet, waiting for the fish to come back, gave me a sense of peacefulness, if that can be used to describe it. the suns just setting, where the sky gets all cool coloured, and you get that friday arvo feeling after schools fininshed when your young. mullet splashes can be seen and heard all over the place, and looking forward towards the mangroves on the other side, bare weathered jetty posts can be seen, standing as a reminder of it's past.
very peaceful i must say but other than the minute sense of happiness this gave me, the balance of life seems to be tilting slightly to the left for me, towards baaad. it's not all that bad i guess, like everyone, there are good times in your life and bad times in your life, tho it just seems at the moment, all my bad times i've had up until now, well not neccesarily bad, but more, hard times, have all been done for little or no gain at all.
maybe i'm just a little too impatient, im always for the optimist, and really, i'm still true to the saying, if you work hard, there will always be something in return but i just feel like it's just soo much more easier to give up. i guess sometimes you've just gotta keep pulling on that rope until it's finally yours.
i hope after this is all over, i will become a better person.
listening to this makes me feel like a bettter person....it's just amazing.
work's pushed back another half an hour and with a start time of 10 tonight, i sit here watching shrek in the lounge room while cola lies on her back alseep in the corner where she's usually at. although theres a few extra bucks lost, the extra hours before work serves awesomely, giving me time to just relax, chill out, and to be worry free for a couple.
with uni and work, as well as the restaurant opening back up, it's hard to find time to relax these days. thursdays seem to go pretty well with only a tute early morning but the weekends are really the only time where i can feel comfortable not worrying about uni.
tbc
autumn has arrived and the mood in the air dramatically changes from a few days back. it's more a chilled, laxed out feeeling i get now, not just literally, the mind feels a bit more eased back as well.
the significant difference in weather, especially when it's cooler, brings back memories, close and distant for me. i've made many memories which surround these cooler months so whenever the air changes, my life seems to change a little as well.
i feel that i reflect alot when it's cold, i guess your more indoors around this time, all cosied up in a blanket on that couch in front of ya tv. i love being outside during winter tho, the crisp freshness in the air and the smell of the soils and trees leave you refreshed asss.
autumn, i love autumn.
....as my little sister leaves on her journey of many lessons, i sit and hope her the best and that she will be able to take home many wonderful experiences and memories and life lessons this world has got to offer.
