nothing special

After only watching half of the Sandlot kids DVD that Bondy had brought over Friday arvo, I decided to finish it before going to bed that night. I must say I enjoyed it just as much as I did in 2nd grade when we rented it out from the now non-existent block buster down the road; old school VHS for a buck (7 weekly's for seven bucks).

I can't believe that even after so many years, I can still remember most of what happen; mind you, I probably watched that movie at least a hundred times. I remember the first baseball glove dad brought home from the flea market a few weeks later after realizing how much I loved baseball. Growing up in Australia didn't give me much of a chance to really get into it considering most of the neighborhood kids grew up with cricket but I still loved it. I loved it so much that when dad finally did bring home that baseball mitt, I begged and pleaded him to bring home a helmet. When he brought a cricket helmet home, I took off the grills on the front and wore it everywhere.

My sister and I would take turns wearing the mitt while throwing tennis balls at each other. It always gave mum grief when she found our pant knees stained green with little holes in them, (usually from slide practice) but I guess she was more relieved that we didn't have knee grazes stained red (she just didn't see them). I always dreamed to be like Benny back then. I loved baseball and even though I had never played a single game in my entire life, I knew I was good at it. It became life, it wasn't just a game anymore.

Every afternoon after getting home from school I would unpack my bag and take my baseball mitt out. Even though I never played with it when I was at school, it always gave me joy to just put it on and feel it for a few seconds, whenever I missed it. The smell of real leather and the weird smell it put on my hands when I took the glove off are ones I'll remember forever. When I put the glove on, I was Benny.

So when I got home, still in my uniform I pulled her out and put her on. No after school supper, no shower, no nintendo, there was just no time. I'd run out to the back yard to find 'the ball', one of many dozens of tennis ball lying around (the bouncy one with plenty of fur on it) to throw as high as I could in the air and attempt to catch it first go. The majority of the time the ball would land dead straight centre inside the glove, I mean, how hard is it to catch a ball that's thrown straight up in the air. But the days where the ball was let go just a little too late and ended up on the roof or an attempted slide missed the ball upon its contact with a surrounding obstacle, or nothing seemed too right, I would make sure I practiced that little bit harder because I knew if I wanted to be as good as Benny, I couldn't miss any catch.

I remember the day when I trialed for my first softball team at school. Even though it was softball and only minor differences were observed compared to baseball, it was as close as I would get to playing baseball. I had been waiting for so long for the chance to show what my practice had transformed me into. I stepped up to the plate, bat in hand and at full swing I hit my first home run. I did the dummy back to third after attempting to run to home which fooled those who hadn't played the game before. After the many years between then and now, I still cannot think of a time were I actually fulfilled the phrase 'step up to the plate' as much as I did that softball trial.

I remember as I grew older, the passion for baseball slowly died and became more and more a game to me. Although I can't pinpoint the exact time I started to lose interest, I think it was when life started to become a little clearer to me. When you start learning more about the world, it starts to disappoint you. I was no longer Benny when I hopped onto the softball ring with bat in hand because at every base there was another Benny, trying to become the best. Even though I hit a hat trick one game against serviceton state school, my dream was swallowed when we got smashed 30 runs to 1 against the murray school which was coincidentally, the first time I was actually scared to bat.

Although I learned of disappointment early, I guess I understand how important it is to try your hardest at everything you do. And if its not meant to be, then it's not meant to be; and you can at least admit that you tried your best.

Man I miss being young. I need to learn from my old self and get back on track.

Come back and teach me 14 year old Ly :|

Another year has past, and another year has begun and even though it's just another day ticking over to another, I do feel a little different.

This year, I spent my early hours of the new year with close friends up on a mountain watching terrible terrible fireworks. They probably wouldn't have been so bad if we had realized that anything seen from 20 or so kilometers away would look pretty small, no matter where you see them from. But none the less, it was an experience needed and one that we will never do again.

As the clock ticked over to twelve and the fireworks filling the minuscule sky viewed from on top of Mt Cootha, we decided that the fireworks weren't worth a half an hour trip down the mountain stuck behind traffic, so we legged it.

Yelling, well more like screaming loud 'Happppppppp-py New Year!!!' to the few we thought would return one, down the mountain brought tears of laughter to my eyes and made me realize that I stressed way way too much over how old I was getting last year.

We had our first maccas for the year and played games at IPM, what a way to start off the New Year hey.....

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Phuccie popped by over in the morning, not even giving me time to get out of bed to get some pants on (mind you, my laptop was right next to me so there was no real 'urgent' need for it anyway') and we talked fishing for a while. We decided to go have a fish to start the new year as well as begin our 'fishing comp' which ends sometime around July.

We finished the night with Phuccie landing 2 flatties, myself a bream and a half, Quangie a bream and phuccies dead flatty which he got disqualified for and bondy with a donut. We ended the start of our new year with a few games of Hon.

What a way to start the new year, one filled with the things we love to do. Hopefully it will be a good year, it's been a decent start so far.

HAPPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!

May it be a year full of fun and enjoyment and one filled with many good memories. Good bye 2009, hello twenty-ten.

I finally reached it, 77 posts; more posts than last year.

And yes, this post counts, even though I cheated,

I make the rules....

Man, I love my little rottie so muuuuuccch!!

I couldn't imagine a day without her to be real honest. She's the only thing in the world that makes me happy on the days when life feels more dreadful than usual.

If only everyone could love like a dog loves their master, I reckon the world would be a much much better place.

So I've sorted out the majority of things which needed to be done this year to have any attempt at making this coming year a more pleasant one. One thing I did learn today were that if everyone were as nice to me as the lady at Centrelink was, I'd probably be a lot less miserable.

I've actually never mentioned being on the benefit have I, but if you didn't know by now that I'm a hole in the wallet, poorer than grubby finger nails then you have no idea. I very much appreciate what the government does for the under privileged and I can definitely hear whispers saying that they aren't so much under privileged, just lazy.

I agree and agree to disagree considering my own situation and how much even a couple of bucks a fortnight can help. If it weren't for the benefit, I really doubt we would be anywhere near how fortunate we are now, I mean, that's what gets the bills paid when you can't. But I do very well agree to those who believe that our taxes are used to pay those who have both arms and legs to move them off their lazy arses to find work but refuse to.

I'm not so much angry but I do believe it's unfair to those who work hard and spend little to barely survive even with government assistance. Maybe I should just be a doll bludger, makes life a little easier hey.

Stuff that, I couldn't imagine getting something for nothing. For every dollar I receive from Centrelink, you can be sure that I will return it in the near future when I turn into that successful Pharmacist the country helped create. Don't worry mum, I'll help you too!

Sometimes I hate preparing for the worst.

I'm always dissapointed; in a good way.

Today is the 28th and in a few days it's going to be 20-10. I can't believe that this year has gone by so fast! I mean, I only just remember sitting there by my lonesome self watching the fireworks end 2008 on the tube.

I've always believed that with every new year came new challenges and opportunities but both these came to those who are willing to look for them. I've found that for some reason, every-time the new year came round, it was much easier to forget the little things that bugged me during the year and to hypothetically turn a new leaf, start fresh. But as much as I ponder and linger to think of the new things I'll do differently this year, I'm actually contemplating whether I should even think about them, considering how this year turned out.

Reading last years new year 'resolution' has got me a little disappointed knowing that pretty much all of what I said I'd do differently this year, went the exact same way. Laziness was my number 1 habit to lose however I don't think I've ever been more lazy.

I can definitely attribute most of my 'uncompleted' (failed seems such a harsh word) tasks to laziness. I promised to quit security, reduce the hours at the sixer and find another job in which paid more and was more enjoyable; which never happened. Being lazy probably got me to end the year with the lowest GPA I've ever had with my first 'fail' in a subject. And being lazy has definitely put a toll on my health; I can't even remember the last time I gymed.

I know that sitting here and thinking about all the things I can improve on from last year would probably make this post near endless, but an episode of scrubs reminded me that sometimes you have to give yourself a break (I actually do wish someone would say that to me sometimes though). Yes I was lazy, and yes this year has probably been one where life didn't progress too much forward, but in the end, I guess there is a difference between acknowledgment and changing and being just sad about it.

I really am not sure if I will change this year but I do know for a fact that I will try harder. Lets welcome 20-10 with our arms wide open!!!!!!

So it's nearly another year past and even though it surely doesn't feel like it, holidays seem to be much closer to an end then ever. The BBQ last sunday felt like a success with most things going by without much of a hassle (the rain sort of broke my heart for a little while but the rummies and beams I had with the boys took all that pain away).

The cow was beautiful but the company I'ld have to admit, determines how any night will turn out. You'll still hear me talk about how grateful I am to still have a good bunch of mates who congregate every couple of times a year to tell lies and listen to them, but why not? It's good how everyone just gets along ay, even though half of them have only heard stories of the other half. Ray got onto me for not 'officially' introducing him to a few of the guys but having met everyone at least more than once before, most of our stories have been shared.

We have a couple of additions this year but with it, a few did leave but that's just life though hey? I think I've actually grown up a little to understand that not all good things in life can and will last forever. You have to hold onto what is left and just let it go when it leaves.

I've been thinking a little less than usual this past week or so and it's probably got to do with how drunk blind I was Sunday night and the intense hangover endured the next day. Now that my head is a little more rested I feel as though I should be thinking about things, I feel weird not though. Maybe I need it? I feel that sometimes I'm too stressed out about things I over analyzed about which is pretty much everything. I've made a plan to stop thinking until the new year starts; a decent enough break I hope.

We'll see how it goes. Hoping for happy holidays all round, I'll come back to update on this no thinking thing probably sooner than later. Take it easyyyy.

So yes, I have been a little stressed out the past couple of weeks with little things here and there compounding to my already long list of worries but none the less, most of them have resolved (considering the majority of them involved the organizing of an end of year BBQ b'day bash for Martin and Phuccie).

I absolutely hate organizing things these days and I really do wonder why I enjoyed it so much when I was younger. I'll probably feel a little more relieved though knowing that tomorrow even though might not turn out in the best possible way; will definitely be better than having organized nothing at all.

We've got a baby cow going on the roaster at around 3, mums salads and springs rolls along with cooked prawns and oysters scattered around somewhere abouts and guests will hopefully start turning up around 4.

I can't wait for it to start hey,,,,,

My to do for tomorrow:
1. Get 5 bags of coal
2. Bring out tables to the backyard
3. Set up some beats
4. Set up some lights
5. Gather the chairs
6. Drink heaps
7. Eat heaps
8. Get blind

just an excerpt from an e-mail i sent to a mate down in adelaide;

With holidays here you’d think that we’d be doing a fair bit of fishing ay, but it seems that everyone’s more caught up with work now that uni is over; it seems the same to me though considering how much I actually did go to uni.

Marks for us came out yesterday and I passed which I’m pretty stoked about ay. Was stressing hard about it especially when I crammed the whole semester in a couple of nights (don’t we all though ay). Probably have to go see the unit coordinator though to beg and plead him to let us do the extra subjects I need, next year instead of prolonging my course for another one.

I haven’t seen much of anyone else since holidays started ay. I fished with phuccie a fair bit down the coast that first week but other than catching small flatties and breambos, nothing much. Phuccies back on his drought after that good session he had that time you came down with us. He’s been a sook lately though and an unlucky bastard at that too. I got a call from him one Sunday arvo (which was a blood stinker mind you) saying that his baby Ferrari had died and that he was in the middle of the road between tackle warehouse and the city waiting for the towie to come. He had turned the air con on and she died at the lights turning right; got the guy behind him to help push (man, sounds a bit familiar hey). Ended up being his distributor but it doesn’t end there hey. We hit a few new spots on the brissie river that night with Quangie and Bondy and after Phuccie lost his lure by noob casting onto a bridge, he lost the tip of his T-curve when the cunt closed my door on it.

He was fucking pissed hey man! It was sooo funny ay, I made it soo much worst though ay. He didn’t say anything again after replying to my ‘why did you close the door on it for?’ with a ‘SHUT THE FUCK UP MAN”. Bro, it was gold man but I feel sorry for the bastard ay. Before we got into the car as well, I asked the cunt if he wanted to put his gear into the boot but he said nah, he’ll take it into the car and then do a superman and jump out when he gets home….fucking hilarious man.

After dropping him off we hit the west end bbc sheds after catching a few livies. A good half or so with no action Bondys rod bends like my rod bent after hitting that threadie off of Sydney street. Not long after, Quangie was on and then my rod started to pull drag! All three of us on live prawns were onto something massive or so we thought anyways. Holding my rod, and a landing net, Quangie pulled the cunt in with his massive shark gear with ease. To our surprise it was a STONKER, catty, definitely worthy of a BRC competitor. As I huffed and puffed with my rod, Quangie ran back down to help out bondy whom was still on with the fight, only to find that it too was a massive catfish and I myself, ashamed, hooked one too. Photos on bondys page does not do the fish justice; they measured 60+ and we actually kept them.

We headed over to a spot down further where only a few nights before I got hit with the biggest jewie I’ve ever seen in the river. A tap tap on my first cast with the natural banana prawn, it ran and I set the hook. My drag set on light; mind you my new rod is no more than a 3 kilo breambo combo with a 3000 shimano on it, it surfaced. The cunt was fucking huge! Quangie and Bondy can vouch as well being at ‘least’ legal. But much like the threadies when they see more shallow waters, the bastard dove and ran and there went my line. After I hooked a live mullet on Bondys rod, he caught the same cunt again and ended with the same story.

So in went the banana prawn again in natural with my normal 1/8 jiggo, my line went slack and for a second I was about to tighten until the rod bent over. Bondy has a vid of me fighting the bastard which ended up being a 58cm jewie; calling the thing ‘fat’ was underestimating it but instead of keeping her for a feed, I let her go to fight another day (sounds familiar hey?) The night started to slow until we noticed that our live prawns were getting smashed; the heads were getting chomped off every one we would throw down. Decreasing our gear to smaller hooks and sinkers, we found that they were breambo when Quangie landed two decent 27+ brembos; not bad for the Brisbane river.
The night was getting quiet and I was getting tired but the boys seemed so keen with Bondy catching catfish all night, I decided to pack up and watch them.

Quangie being quangie began to fillet the catties and use them as bait. After throwing a few fish carcasses down the river and throwing his filleted catfish bait out, unexpected, his rod shoots from vertical to just past horizontal with the drag as light as shit as well. After the couple of seconds or so with something massive on its end, the metal trace gave way and we were shocked to think it was most likely a shark. Nearly losing a second rod, Quangie caught bondys rod mid air and it ended the same way; metal trace gone and main line frayed.

Quangie set up again and within seconds of throwing out his bait, he landed a 48cm cod which made me jealous as shit; it was beautiful man. That ended the night.

man, i need a new job hey

A few recent fishing photos

officially on holidays (started a week ago)
officially finished uni for the year (started a week ago)

officially sick of work (started a year ago, but finally realized that i need something better to do)

first bird that gets the morning worm,
but the second mouse that gets the cheese.

get rid of the baggage. i'll try and get down a few lectures before coming back here.

- stop facebooking
- stop watching tv
- stop looking at fishing gear
- stop checking hotmail

-start focusing!

Now that that is out of the way, I can actually talk about how life is in a more positive view. Damn, I never actually thought venting like that would make me feel so much better.~~~

So life is kind of slow at the moment. University exams are finally here and while we have been in SWATVAC for what seems like so long, I've only just realized that it's nearly over and have no progress into studying whatsoever. Pharmacogenomics is apparently the first exam I have on the 6th and although all semester it has been a kind of do and guess type of subject, the final seems to be quite straight forward. Study the 5 lectures he's given us and pass.

I actually did hit the books last night and smashed down 2 lectures, very briefly. I skimmed over therapeutics the other night and all i can say is that in the week coming up to that exam, it will be nothing short of hectic......(too hungry and tired to continue).....

so i am here to chuck a sook about all the little stupid things that have made my day just that little bit worst....

1. mum never picking up the bloody home fone.

2. stupid people stealing the hot water i boiled to eat the last mi goreng i was intending to eat.

3. stupid people

4. people who use the 'internets' or 'apparent reliable sources' to show how smart they are to the dumbest things

5. people with no common sense

6. people who complain about things they can change but can't be arsed to do anything about. (yes i hate myself).

7. mummas boys

8. people who don't appreciate advice (at least respect it if you ask for it)

9. people who can't take 'conservative' criticism

10. have i said stupid people yet?