i'm listening to a bit of oldschool lifehouse at the mo cause my horoscope reckons listening to music today will make me enjoy it much more. as a matter of fact, i do actually enjoy it alot more than i usually do. maybe it's because all i've been doing today is hitting the books pretty hard and haven't really found proper time to wind down.
i haven't youtubed hardly as much as i have been, and with the redbull i had this morning the wings it actually gave, carried me above my books all day; i'm being carried by two sets of wings atm. i had dinner with mum today which was pretty cool. i'm not quite sure of the last time we did but today just felt pretty special really ay. we reminisced of the good old days and comforted each other for the future that's to come. it's really tight at the moment, especially with sewing season for shirts slowly coming to a halt and having exams just round the corner, like i've complained before, it's gonna hurt real bad in the few weeks to come.
mum always said stick to it and i've always followed that philosophy. i always dream that tomorrow, from some kind of fate, i'll buy that first ever lottery ticket and win. i could think of a million ways to spend the money but i guess when reality finally catches up to me, would having the money even change a thing? i know i'm a bit over myself, having you know i'm probably the poorest dude out there at the moment but truthfully, other than having the weekly bills paid for what say, a few years, would it really help me and give me the opportunity to concentrate on building myself to become who i ultimately want to be?
sometimes i wish i were in hardships from the start of my life. nothing can be a true lesson unless it bores your mental mind and destroys you physically. something you work long and hard for and come so desperately close to failure everytime. something which puts you in a state of mind everyday of your living life, where succeeding is only comfronted by another opportunity to fail, that, solely is a lesson i'ld rather be taught. i'm not quite sure even if i had all i wanted at the moment that i would be completely satisfied.
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