i've finally realised that it's probably about the time to actually manage this blog rather than pretending to do it by adding random posts. things have been quite hectic lately so i haven't really had the time to post properly (that's probably a lie) but yeah, i'm going to do it now. have decided to stay home tomorrow because it's going to probably be a 30+ degree day but mostly because i've been out way too much. i know, the guys are probably saying, "your full of shit mate" knowing that my parents aren't at home anymore but you know, it's just a responsible thing you know boys, knowing when to stop.
i'll probably go hard posting and updating till about 3:30 or just whenver the sun rises really. i'm not sure why or how i came up with the deadlines but they just exist ay. at least to me, it will make me a bit more productive knowing i've got to finish something before the set time or unfortunate events that i'm still not certain of will occur.
hmmmm, chop chop, dig dig, chop chop, dig dig, chop chop, dig dig, chop chop, dig dig...just need something to fill in this blank space....ya know....stylish mate, you can't have blank spaces, it just doesn't look right in a blog ya know....
hmmmm, an update on the goals for the past couple of days has left me to cross off:
make a food and supplements chart (still to print out)
put council dog tabs on collar (doing it now)
buy more connecting wires for home cinema (bought the subwoofer cable the other night)
post more pictures on blog (there will be a few pretty pictures for you to enjoy in this post)
buy fish for the fish tank (bought 70 dollars worth of fish which isn't really much)
check for council pickup times on junk (all our junk we want to throw out will be picked up in may) 
yeah, work has been great awesome great lately. nothing really special, i'm not sure if i mentioned that i worked big day out. it was crazy and that's about all i can say about it. it's like looking after a million bevans or a million evans in 40+ degree weather ay. hahaha but i guess i did gather alot of experience from it as well as having a listen to some of the best bands in the world....fark...evermore, the sick puppies, tool and scribe went off ay. i can just remember that evermore: it's too late riff and the reaction it got from the crowd....amazing mate. other than working, it's just been gym, going out and sleeping. that's probably about it ay, ohh and looking after the house.
for gym im soo happy ay, i'm actually progressing, not like all the other years i've been doing on and off and then leaving a few weeks later cause i got bored of it. i guess motivation is the main thing ay, i've gained probably 2/3 cms on my bi's ever since i started and can lift nearly more than double what i started on. cheers to bondy for the encouragment and mentoring ay, he's a pretty choice gym buddy. yeah, gym relaxes me ay....if i get angry or annoyed about something; after a gym session you could beat me with a stick and i would smile and walk off as if nothing happend (most likely not) but you know what i mean.
yeah, i feel a sense of dunedin running in my blood at the moment. i was telling bevsta this just today, just how that feeling of independence and freedom you get down at otago has gotten to me ever since mum left for a vietnam visit. i mean, i know, i know, most have experience this long before i ever thought about it but it feels good ay. as much as i always want someone there to cook for me, wash my clothes for me, clean up after me, doing it all yourself to me gives me some satisfaction, i guess bad habits are results of too much nurturing. i'll probably be back to the same old self once mum gets back home. (i hope i'm not).
with uni just around the corner, it seems as though i've wasted my 6 months on break ay. i've done most of my timetable and am pretty happy to say that i've got mondays and fridays off. mean hard, a four day weekend which will probably be days to catch up on the work i missed out during the week. lol, hopefully it's a new beginning for me and i've been through enough shit to know that this is probably my final chance to get it right ay. i pray ay.
farout, this evanescence song lithium is bloody amazing ay. i've had it on repeat for a while now and i'm still confused and dazed at the fact that there are people out there who are gifted with talents which can make a difference to the world. the main singers voice is absolutely amazing ay. after watching this songs live mv on video hits one morning, i'm still uncertain whether or not it's any different from their actual recording. she sings live exactly how she would sing it on the recording, it's really quite amazing ay.
yep, my head now is leaning on my neck and i've to make an effort to keep my eyes open. sorry but i'll have to break my word that i'll finish up at the time stated. maybe tomorrow or tonight ay, i'll make sure i update my to do list at least. take care people, hope you enjoyed this long blog filled with random accounts of happenings for the past few weeks.
picture1: fat and phuc at the golfing range with kerwin and lam. it was a fun session, poor young asian blokes and "gentlemen" don't mix, go there and you'll know what i mean.
picture2: lams b'day and the 3 litre tequila
picture3: my dog cola
picture4: bondy showing his taste of fashion.
yeah i've been cramming heaps of stuff in lately, mostly because of mums going to vietnam and uni starting just around the corner. i don't think i've done too bad, hopefully i'll get the few things left over done by the end of this month. if not, i guess there's always the next.
finish cloudstreet
step up and look after my cat
check up for my hecs-help
make a food and supplements chart
make gym measurements and record
put council dog tabs on collar
clean the rest of the house
buy more connecting wires for home cinema
fix the lawn mower and mow the lawn
advertise the boats
burn phuc house and step up
start looking over science notes
visit marius
post more pictures on blog
ring qhss and ask for pay slip
update and post completed goals
buy fish for the fish tank
buy flowers for the garden
check for council pickup times on junk
enrol to qut
ask the boys for which papers i should take for my course
re-confirm my shifts for this week (12 monastry, 8 calamvale, 9 alex hills, 6:30am big day out)
clean my roomcall justine (she called)
a few things i've completed since yesterday and some things to be done by the end of the month
finish cloudstreet
watch pursuit of happiness, step up and look after my cat
teach Co Uc how to use messenger on her laptop
just a list of the few things i need to complete by the end of the month. i have a to do list widgit but never really come to ever noticing it; maybe if i blog it i'll be able to keep track of what i've already done and no done.
accept my offer for qutapply for hecs-help
check up for my hecs-help
enrol to qut
ask the boys for which papers i should take for my course
fix up centrelink
re-confirm my shifts for this week (12 monastry, 8 calamvale, 9 alex hills, 6:30am big day out)
ask about big day out information
get creatine and more proteinmake a gym workout chart
make a food and supplements chart
make gym measurements and record
finish looking for alibrandi
return the da vinchi code and the interpreter to video ezy
drink 3 glasses of green tea a day
drink 5 litres of water a day
wash the dog/ put council dog tabs on collar
clean my car
clean my room/ clean the toilet/ clean the house
fold the clothes
fix the lawn mower and mow the lawn
advertise the boats
check my car rego expiry date
find out if any bills need to be paid
burn phuc house and step up
start looking over science notes
visit marius
call dad
call justine
sew the fitness first bag up
post more pictures on blog
ring qhss and ask for pay slip
update and post completed goals
weed and water the garden
farout...looks like i've got a fair bit to do, gotta get off my arse soon.
The 7 Habits of Highly Efective Teens: Sean Covey
when i read, or hear about, or watch stories like these, it lights my heart with joy knowing that even those who aren't as fortunate as others can still live a very worthwhile and fullfilling life. watching the story by Rick Reilly moved me so much that i've decided to review my life and see what i've really done or missed out on. a teary fat says enjoy what's below; it's one of the many contributions to the answers of living life.
[From Sports Illustrated, By Rick Reilly]
I try to be a good father. Give my kids mulligans. Work nights to pay For their text messaging. Take them to swimsuit shoots.
But compared with Dick Hoyt, I suck.
Eighty-five times he's pushed his disabled son, Rick, 26.2 miles in Marathons. Eight times he's not only pushed him 26.2 miles in a Wheelchair but also towed him 2.4 miles in a dinghy while swimming and Pedaled him 112 miles in a seat on the handlebars--all in the same day.
Dick's also pulled him cross-country skiing, taken him on his back Mountain climbing and once hauled him across the U.S. On a bike. Makes Taking your son bowling look a little lame, right?
And what has Rick done for his father? Not much--except save his life.
This love story began in Winchester , Mass. , 43 years ago, when Rick Was strangled by the umbilical cord during birth, leaving him Brain-damaged and unable to control his limbs.
"He'll be a vegetable the rest of his life;'' Dick says doctors told him And his wife, Judy, when Rick was nine months old. ``Put him in an Institution.''
But the Hoyts weren't buying it. They noticed the way Rick's eyes Followed them around the room. When Rick was 11 they took him to the Engineering department at Tufts University and asked if there was Anything to help the boy communicate. ``No way,'' Dick says he was told. ``There's nothing going on in his brain.''
"Tell him a joke,'' Dick countered. They did. Rick laughed. Turns out a Lot was going on in his brain. Rigged up with a computer that allowed Him to control the cursor by touching a switch with the side of his Head, Rick was finally able to communicate. First words? ``Go Bruins!'' And after a high school classmate was paralyzed in an accident and the School organized a charity run for him, Rick pecked out, ``Dad, I want To do that.''
Yeah, right. How was Dick, a self-described ``porker'' who never ran More than a mile at a time, going to push his son five miles? Still, he Tried. ``Then it was me who was handicapped,'' Dick says. ``I was sore For two weeks.''
That day changed Rick's life. ``Dad,'' he typed, ``when we were running, It felt like I wasn't disabled anymore!''
And that sentence changed Dick's life. He became obsessed with giving Rick that feeling as often as he could. He got into such hard-belly Shape that he and Rick were ready to try the 1979 Boston Marathon.
``No way,'' Dick was told by a race official. The Hoyts weren't quite a Single runner, and they weren't quite a wheelchair competitor. For a few Years Dick and Rick just joined the massive field and ran anyway, then They found a way to get into the race Officially: In 1983 they ran another marathon so fast they made the Qualifying time for Boston the following year.
Then somebody said, ``Hey, Dick, why not a triathlon?''
How's a guy who never learned to swim and hadn't ridden a bike since he Was six going to haul his 110-pound kid through a triathlon? Still, Dick Tried.
Now they've done 212 triathlons, including four grueling 15-hour Ironmans in Hawaii . It must be a buzzkill to be a 25-year-old stud Getting passed by an old guy towing a grown man in a dinghy, don't you Think?
Hey, Dick, why not see how you'd do on your own? ``No way,'' he says. Dick does it purely for ``the awesome feeling'' he gets seeing Rick with A cantaloupe smile as they run, swim and ride together.
This year, at ages 65 and 43, Dick and Rick finished their 24th Boston Marathon, in 5,083rd place out of more than 20,000 starters. Their best Time? Two hours, 40 minutes in 1992--only 35 minutes off the world Record, which, in case you don't keep track of these things, happens to Be held by a guy who was not pushing another man in a wheelchair at the Time.
``No question about it,'' Rick types. ``My dad is the Father of the Century.''
And Dick got something else out of all this too. Two years ago he had a Mild heart attack during a race. Doctors found that one of his arteries Was 95% clogged. ``If you hadn't been in such great shape,'' One doctor told him, ``you probably would've died 15 years ago.'' So, in a way, Dick and Rick saved each other's life.
Rick, who has his own apartment (he gets home care) and works in Boston, and Dick, retired from the military and living in Holland, Mass. , always find ways to be together. They give speeches around the country and compete in some backbreaking race every weekend, including this Father's Day.
That night, Rick will buy his dad dinner, but the thing he really wants to give him is a gift he can never buy.
``The thing I'd most like,'' Rick types, ``is that my dad sit in the chair and I push him once.''
And the video is below....
http://cjcphoto.com/can/
hey all. yes i know it's been a while since my last post but nothing "too" interesting has happened since then. haven't done too much since then other than humiliating ourselves at the driving range and going to our "secret" fishing spot which because of our drought has pretty much left us with no water to fish. nonetheless, everything seems to be going pretty alright, well problems are in the proccess of being solved so it's a real good start. work has slightly gotten more boring or maybe i just can't be stuffed trying to make it more fun....yippie. hahaha, i think i've solved family and friends ay; not really but what's done or not done is working good for me so yeah, it doesn't seem too bad. life in general is up at just above average at the moment. for once i don't have to worry about anything. i'm actually working towards my goals on my list now. life right now other than be slightly better if i won the lotto is pretty sweet ay. i'm happy but i think it's probably got to do with my exercising everyday making me less grumpy. exercise releases endorphins, try it sometime. i'll probably publish this draft now just for those who actually visit this thing to have something to read. i'll blog more when i wake up hopefully. take care. ciao
while standing at the back door of the brunswick hotel and keeping an eye on the drunk people counting down the seconds to the new year, i started to reminisc about all the significant things which happend this particular year and not any other previous years. the first memory which came to mind was the start of last year. i remember watching the fireworks, bright red ones, lighting up the skies. i remember my exact thoughts and feelings i had the second the clock counted down to 2006, the second it ticked over. i felt as if i had everything. my carefree friends were among me, my family were only a few kilometres away and the thought that it's only just getting closer to the time i begin my next step in life. the words of the song far away was repeated and my memories of the day i left australia for a new home flashed within my mind. instantly my memories of new zealand were summoned. i remember sitting in my tiny room alone, and then the time i had about 10 massive blokes cramped inside. other than those i've already discussed, the only other memories that were remembered were those not worth remembering but i guess it's better to not take things back from the past.
alot of people compare themselves now to themselves exactly one year ago. i can see that i've grown in so many ways. (im pretty sure i've talked about it heaps of times already). i can see my impatience though has started to degrade as well as my tolerance levels but i'll try my best to improve them this year. things which have changed in relation to friends and family, well has changed alot. those who i were close to the start of last year, seem to have dissapeared and those who i never thought i would be close to have been there for my toughest times. time really does show truth, but i guess that's just how life is. my loving family is nothing short of dogshit (i really am not exaggerating) but like a friend told me, respect, respect, respect, so i guess that's all i can really do. i guess i can appreciate the "few" happy times we all had together. although i'm in no position to say that life at the moment is great or wonderful, i guess i am happy on how things turned out this year. if happenings didn't occur this year, i don't think i would of learnt how to be strong and motivate myself on my own through the tough times.
it's been a great year, i hope this year although it has already begun with a few mishaps, will be a year i'll look back and say, whoa, it was a great year. i hope you all have a great one as well. no regrets.
hey guys, hope you all had a real mean new years. i know mine wasn't too flashy but lets not go there yet ay, it's a new year, we gotta be all happy and look forward to what's to come this year. i'm looking forward to crossing off more goals than last year and to become slightly more of a better person. i hope to travel back to new zealand to see my most missed mates and hope that i don't have to deal with as many problems as i did last year. i hope to be more productive and achieve more from even more hard, sweat and blood dripping work. hope it all works out.
yes, i would like to apologise for my random babblings and the bad grammer associated with my last blog. i've only had time after work these past couple of days to blog. (security work night, sleep day). it's quarter to 5 on new years eve morning. the sky is nearly lit. i need to sleep.
farout, it’s been ten days since I last had internet. Lets just recap.
Nothing much has really happened, i’ve only remembered a few days:
Lams b’day down at the coast
Getting my car nearly fixed
Going fishing with Paul, Phuc and Ross down at Coolangatta
Joining fitness first.
Christmas shopping out at Chermside
Going dinner at Tiens and cruising
Dota
Lams’ b’day down at the coast.
It was our goal for the night we stayed down at the condor apartments to finish a 3 litre bottle of tequila. Probably among one of the most stupid things we’ve ever attempted. I fell asleep at around 7:30 after trying to keep up with Phuc, taking shots in 3’s. Woke up at around 11 when Ross came by and I stayed back with Kerwin in the apartment while the others went out clubbing. We cleaned all the little bits of peanuts and junk all over the floor and had a good catch up talk, most of it consisting of funny random shit that pop into our minds. Fell asleep after the guys turned up back home, woke up, swam, went home and slept some more.
Getting my car nearly fixed.
I’m finally getting my car fixed. It’s all nearly done ay, overall I reckon I’ll spend about 2 and a half, not happy but just finally got some stuff off my chest at least. It took about 6 – 8 hours for my mechanic to take the engine off. He said it’s probably one of the hardest cars he’s ever worked on. I guess it is pretty damn cramped in there. After getting the heads off, we saw the burnt up, lifted gaskets which was the result of my cylinder valve problems. After taking the heads to be compression tested, radiator to be cleaned out and ordering, purchasing and receiving of parts, it was time to put everything back together. One more day till it can be finally over and done with and I can drive my little maroon beast around once again.
Going fishing with Paul, Phuc and Ross down at Coolangatta
Yeah this was a pretty mean night. We decided we’d go fishing sometime around about 2 or 3 in the arvo and Paullie was keen on driving down. Ross picked me up after getting his new shiny red celica and we decided to drive round to Paullies place to show off Ross’ new ride. Just as we pulled up at Pauls’ driveway, out comes Paul who jumps into Tins brand new s15. Damn, that’s one hot car ay. The boys did what boys did and raced to see who had the quicker car. Knowing that s15’s run stock sr20det motors along with it being probably about 80 kilo’s lighter with Paul and Tin in it, you’d prolly already know who won. We went woolies shopping afterwards to grab some snacks for fishing. You can never have too many snacks for a fishing trip. Picked up Phuccie later on and we were good. I drove down in Paullies astina which is heaps of fun. Getting down to Tweeds we drove around for another hour or so trying to figure out our “secret spot”. We never found it and just decided to fish under some big ass bridge. Biggest catch was Phuccies massive puffer fish which inflated to be the size of a bloody basketball which also pissed on me. Other than that, little bream and what seemed to be, actually to be truthful I wasn’t quite sure, we just caught heaps of them and they looked edible so we took them. A few hours of that, and getting real restless and hungry, it was time to find a place to sit down and cook what we had. Paullie was there so the food he made from pretty much a few packets of noodles, some eggs, prawn bait and a bream was delicious. Phuccie and I slept all the way home while Paullie drove. I think Paullie fell asleep a few times as well.
Joining fitness first
I received a call 10 o’clock some morning telling me that Timmy referred me to fitness first down at Mt Gravatt. Thought I would see how it was so agreed to come and visit after about a half hours talking to one of the fitness first personal trainers. The place is great, heaps of equipment, heaps of facilities (they have a bloody aromatherapy room as well as free body gel when you have a shower) and it’s just a real nice, clean, modern place to work out. I joined and will get bigger (I’m obliged to pay 80 bucks a month whether or not I train). Talk to you more about my progress later.
Christmas shopping out at Chermside.
Yeah this night was pretty cool. I remember my stress levels rising heaps around this day though ay; taking in more problems than I could handle. I think I’ve got to really fix that up in my life ay. To me, it seems when something bad happens, I let all the other bad things build up before I start to sort them all out at once. Too impatient I must say. After having a good talk to Evo , Donald, Lam and Eddy I was back to normal and ready to let everything go for a few hours. We drove over to Chermside and met up with everyone else and had a ball ay. The atmosphere was great, just the rush everyone had to complete their Christmas shopping lists and just how there were so many people pushing and shoving their way through massive crowds. After finishing my shopping, (I thought I would just forget about my money problems for Christmas, knowing that Christmas only comes around once a year) and had a good catch up chat to those who weren’t shopping for their own gifts. I only really remember one thing after the long night. I’m broke but I have presents.
Going dinner at Tiens and cruising
I received an sms from Ross about two hours before he wanted to go eat for Christmas at Tiens. Him and Jimmy were over my place within probably a half an hour after that and we went to wash our cars. After a good 8 bucks at superwash, headed around and picked up Bond and Justine and we were off to Tiens. His restaurant is real nice ay. It’s real trendy stuff ay; got some inspiration for my own place. His menu isn’t too shabby either, offering kangaroo and crocodile though he didn’t recommend the croc. We got mates rates 40 percent off and sat round waiting for Tien to finish. We all then went for a “Ross” cruise cause he wanted to test out his car. It was pretty mean, we drove in a block of a yellow, blue, green and red car. It was pretty much our typical cruise, driving up to mount cootha and then standing around wondering where the hell to go next. Evan and Trung joined us later and we decided to go and grab some more food to eat. Went by Milton Maccas but it made our history books when we saw it the first time ever closed. Decided we would go and place some soccer so Justine dropped by work and took a lost property plastic ball for us, I dropped off Justine and we were kicking a red plastic ball around down under the bridge at kangaroo point. Tien brought out a slingshot from his car and his mate Tommy brought out sparklers. We ended up just shooting each other (Me shooting everyone else) with the slingshot and throwing lit sparklers at each other. Went over to sunnybank afterwards and bought 8 dollar 3 month old sandwiches at 711. Did pretty much the same thing as up at Mt Cootha and after probably 2 hours, we decided to go home. Was a good night, haven’t done anything like that in ages.
Dota
Kerwin plays Dota, Kerwin is nerd.
I hate leaving problems to sort themselves out.
Just give it time…. I don’t have any time.
yep, christmas is over and i've finally got my internet back. found out that the line my net was connected to got ripped apart by a rat. i've got my modem in the middle of the lounge room now, connected to another wall socket. hope you all had a very merry christmas. blogging will start as soon as i come back from donalds piss up tonight. ciao.
something funny i found cruising around the net.
The Five Stages Of Drunkenness And Sobering Up
Drinking
Stage 1 - Clever: This is when you suddenly become an expert on every subject in the known universe. You know you know everything and you want to pass on your knowledge to anyone who will listen. At this stage you are always right. And, of course, the person you are talking to is very wrong. This takes for an interesting argument when both parties are CLEVER.
Stage 2 - Attractive: This is when you realise that you are the most ATTRACTIVE person in the entire bar and that everyone fancies you. You can go up to a perfect stranger knowing that they fancy you and really want to talk to you. Bear in mind that you are still CLEVER, so you can talk to this person about any subject under the sun.
Stage 3 - Rich: This is when you suddenly become the RICHEST person in the room. You can buy drinks for the entire bar because you have a bottomless wallet. You can also make bets at this stage, because of course you are still CLEVER so, naturally, you will always win. Anyway, it doesn't matter how much you bet because you are RICH. You will also buy drinks for everyone that you fancy, in the knowledge that you are clearly the most ATTRACTIVE person present.
Stage 4 - Invincible: You are now ready to pick fights with anyone and everyone, especially those with whom you have been betting or arguing. This is because you are now INVINCIBLE. At this point you can also go up to the partners of the people who you fancy and challenge them to a battle of wits or strength. You have no fear of losing this battle, because as well as being INVINCIBLE you are CLEVER, you're RICH and you're more ATTRACTIVE than them anyway.
Stage 5 - Invisible: This is the final stage of drunkenness. At this point you can do anything, because you are now INVISIBLE. You can dance on a table to impress the people who you fancy because the rest of the people in the room cannot see you. You can also snog the face off them for the same reason. You are also INVISIBLE to the people who want to fight you. You can walk through the street singing at the top of your lungs because no one can see or hear you and because you're still CLEVER you know all the words.
Sobering Up
Stage 1 - Stupid: As you regain consciousness and begin to enjoy the headache, the churning stomach and the cold sweats you realise that you have lost not only several hours of your life but also the ability to concentrate on anything whatsoever. You are now STUPID and will remain so for a minimum of 12 hours.
Stage 2 - Ugly: Never entirely happy with the effects of the bathroom mirror first thing you are horrified to discover that you have now become even UGLIER than you previously thought possible. Not only have you bloodshot eyes and a glorious collection of spots but you are shaking so much that your grandfather probably looks healthier.Unfortunately you are still too STUPID to know better than to try and shave whilst shaking.
Stage 3 - Poor: Having crawled out of bed and got dressed you are about to shamble out the door when you discover that the money that was to last you the week is now missing from your wallet. Being STUPID, you have no idea what happened to it but the traces of curry on your clothes allow the possibility that you might have treated everyone to a takeaway at some point. Alternatively your pocket could have been picked or you might have given the taxi driver a fifty by mistake. Rationalising that you couldn't possibly have been that STUPID and that you would remember being robbed, you come to believe that you were the only one who bought any food or drinks all night and start to loathe all your friends.
Stage 4 - Fragile: As you are now STUPID, UGLY and POOR, your consequently FRAGILE self-esteem plummets. Your already FRAGILE physical condition ensures that you feel liable to shatter if anyone even speaks to you.
Stage 5 - Conspicuous: This is the final stage of sobering up. Unfortunately, everyone can spot this CONSPICUOUS condition and its cause from a great distance. Even worse, they know that they can complete your misery by making fun of you, and that you are too STUPID to retaliate, too FRAGILE to hit them,too POOR to bribe them and too UGLY to hide.
http://www.rupissed.com/5stages.html
yes, as i was saying before my random outburst, i guess yes, i was over-reacting just a little; one thing lead to another and feelings held in and let go at the wrong time. it isn't really as bad as i put it out to be. i guess there is always someone who will listen even if it has to be the man upstairs; he always listens. after my shift yesterday, i've realised that even drunk people will listen to you. maybe drunk people are just better listeners ay, i guess in some way, alcohol does curtain the way you originally feel so maybe they need someone to listen to as well.
hahaha maybe not ay. i'm not quite sure of where i was going with this post cause it's taken me about 3 days to get to here. i think one of my main thoughts i wanted to share at the start of my post was how it just seemed like alot of things fade in the end whether it be good or bad. i think the thing that made me think that was the song shimmer by fuel. listened to it on my shift out at the back gate the other night and just the way the two guitarist performed it made me really listen out to what they were saying ay.
"We're here and now, will we ever be again 'Cause I have found All that shimmers in this world is sure to fade Away again"
maybe a few days back when i was feeling a bit down i probably would of definately agreed with the lyrics, but now, i'm not quite sure. there we go, the emotion of the moment talking again, the technique of thinking of a problem 6 months down the track thing really does work ay. i reckon now that it's safe that my mind isn't caught up with too much, i can really question whether or not these words really mean anything. to an extent, i guess everything fades. life at the moment seems to be fading a little bit but i know for sure that when that good day comes, things will start to glow again. maybe i should just take the lyrics as describing the many ups and downs of life and to never lose hope because the thing that had faded was once before shimmering. no-one remembers the emploded star, only the brightness of it before. hahaha....maybe....
so a new week has begun ay. starting my first shift for this week in a few hours. it hardly feels as bad as people put it out to be ay, "yay *sarcasticly* another week of hard work before the next weekend". I guess worked really did seem like that back at the flower market days with 4:30 starts on a monday morning but i'm really starting to enjoy security ay. well they always do say that work you enjoy isn't really work. other than that, everything else doesn't seem too 100 percent ish.
when i look back and compare my life now with life a few years back, i reckon the old fat would come up to me and ask "what up wif you?". i try not to believe that older people are right when they say enjoy it while your young because when you get older all your going to do is work; become part of the ultimate rat race. i just can't help it ay. i mean, yeah of course everyone has to work hard to live a comfortable life but there just seems to be so much missing at the moment. there seems to be no-one to talk to, no-one who will listen, no-one who can give any advice which will make a difference.....SHIT I'VE GOTTA GET READY FOR WORK AY. HAHAHA. TBC
stop this train - john mayer
No, I'm not colorblind
I know the world is black and white
I try to keep an open mind
But I just can't sleep on this tonight
Stop this train
I want to get off
And go home again
I can't take the speed it's moving in
I know I can't
But honestly, won't someone stop this train?
Don't know how else to say it
I don't want to see my parents go
One generation's length away
From fighting life out on my own
Stop this train
I want to get off
And go home again
I can't take the speed it's moving in
I know I can't
But honestly, won't someone stop this train?
So scared of getting older
I'm only good at being young
So I play the numbers game
To find a way to say that life has just begun
Had a talk with my old man
Said "help me understand"
He said "turn sixty-eight
You renegotiate"
"Don't stop this train
Don't for a minute change the place you're in
Don't think I couldn't ever understand
I tried my hand
John, honestly we'll never stop this train"
Once in awhile, when it's good
It'll feel like it should
And they're all still around
And you're still safe and sound
And you don't miss a thing
Till you cry when you're driving away in the dark
Singing
Stop this train
I want to get off
And go home again
I can't take the speed it's moving in
I know I can't
Cause now I see I will never stop this train
yep, i don't think i'll ever beat how lazy and bored i was today. i could of been out there earning some dosh but after a night like last night, moving wasn't really one of my main priorities ay.
i slept so much today ay, i'm really not sure how though ay. i'm pretty decent at about 7 hours every night but am still tired after about 16 today.
got some news on my car today. looks like i'm going to be ripping my stock kl03/klde engine out and swapping it with a klze. thought well, after the mechanic told me it's going to cost about the same to throw an engine in than fix the bloody valves, i might as well just get the engine ay. it packs an extra 70 or so more horsepower and is made in japan so i might as well anyways then ay.
hey have stopped worrying about the things i can't do anything about anymore. hahaha i bet it's time i stopped whinging and complaining about everything as well. the car can be fixed and money can be made. the pear shape of everything is slowly reshaping. was stoked as when ross and i got an extra shift this week, so i guess an extra hundred or so bucks a week takes a bit of stress away from nearly due monies as well as christmas time nearing.
we ordered pizza today (so much for the getting back into routine thing), and yeah, i think i'm going to stick to what donald told me the other night. having too much of something you really love causes you to slowly stop appreciating why it was so good in the first place. pizza was yuck even though i was hungry as. it just didn't taste the same; i already had pizza three times this week and had had enough to eat. why is it that sharing something or not having enough of something makes you enjoy and cherish it more? i remember fighting over the last piece of pizza over at rickys the other night with about 7 other guys. every bite was simple heaven.
i'm halfway through looking for alibrandi. i'm not sure if i mentioned that i was reading it again. if not, well...i am? yeah, it's still a good read the second time through. i know, i'm not much of a reader or a bright guy who understands and goes hard on english literature but 'looking for alibrandi' has things i can relate to ay. yes, it's through the eyes of an italian sicilian attractive girl and i'm a vietnamese fat guy but just the little things like problems with family, money and friends helps me reflect on how i can make all those problems a bit better in my life.
something real mean i got from reading the book, i think it was at the end of chapter 12, 'is good enough really good enough?' just posing a question, i'm still to think more about it.
anyways, i think i can cross out another goal today. i'm not quite sure if it's on the list but i lost track of the day today. i'm not usually ever like that, i'm always up to date with most stuff due to tv and always checking my phone for the date and stuff but today, i think it was because i slept too much and it stuffed up my head. i really thought it was thursday today ay. yeah yeah, nufin special but i was real relieved as when i found out that i didn't need to work tomorrow. just something i wanted to share.
'howdie dudie, how's your nudie?'
yep, drinking doesn't solve jack. hahaha, my head still hurts and i can feel my brain rip away from my skull. i think i need to keep more hydrated next time i drink, if i ever drink again. hope lam had a real mean b'day. we drank way too much random stuff ay, mixing spirits and beers; farout, jim beam and cola tastes yuck ay.
i'm hungover like hell and still worried about all that's happened and still to happen. my cars' dead, i'm working 2 days a week and in a couple of weeks, money is gonna be a very important topic around the house. why is it that money can take control of so many things. i really don't care too much, i mean, i think it's time i start looking for more work anyway but just so cut on how it makes people change.
it seems as though those who have it, can't live without it and those who don't have it will complain that they have none of it. ohhh, maybe the hangover is just making me grumpy and the junk i've been eatting the past couple of days is trying to fight it's way back into my regular routine again. i aint gonna let it happen ay. hahaha, no more break days, no more treats, getting down to business, and i know it's always harder to walk the walk than talk the talk but i guess we'll just see after some time ay.
more work and no play make ly go something something.
yeah, alot of "unexpected" stuff has happened, too much for me to be happy about but i guess i can't really do anything about it. i'm gonna hopefully drink my sorrows away tonight. maybe not, just have a few with the birthday boy lam. happy b'day mate, hope ya have a real mean one. yeah, i think i gotta have some time to think things over ay. it will be right. time will tell ay.
for some weird instant i somehow became obsessed with balloons. the kid inside me wants to hold onto the balloon but the adult i'm slowly turning into wants me to let it go. why i have this thought, i really don't know, let me just show you how i feel with a few pieces from deviantart.
balloons by ~rumpelwicht
http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/36407088/?qo=112&q=balloons&qh=boost%3Apopular+age_sigma%3A24h+age_scale%3A5
mary poppins by ~super-glue
http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/37032204/?qo=26&q=balloons&qh=boost%3Apopular+age_sigma%3A24h+age_scale%3A5
balloon6 by ~otrebla
http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/44031567/
the last photo hasn't really got anything to do with what i said above i just think its real mean. like how there have been many times where i would of loved for the other person opposite me to turn into a balloon. gently floating in the air, swaying from side to side, carefree. i guess if you were a balloon you would have no choice which i guess could be another interpretation of balloon6. maybe i guess another way to see this photo would be that it'd suck if you were a balloon. you are meant to float and fly and be free from dirty hands or the object in which your tied too. i guess like another member at da described, even though it's still a balloon, it seems as though it's distracted. it's as if it wants to get away from the situation and be set free. haha, maybe it does have something to do with what i said before.
